Friends. Gone are the days of a quality Big 10 Conference. After UF's dismantling of OSU in front of a national audience, USC's shellacking of Michigan in the Rose Bowl, and Michigan's stellar start to the season at 0-2, it's sad days for the mideasters.
In light of that, somebody came up with a Bud Light Real Men of Genius spin off. So read the words below, and make sure you sing it to yourself. It's way funnier. If you don't know what I'm talking about, you can listen to some old commercials here.
So without further ado...
Bud Light presents Real Men of Genius
(Reeeeaaal Men of Genius)
Today we salute you, Mr. Delusional Michigan Fan
(Mr. Delusional Michigan Faaaaaan!)
Season after season, year after year, you try to
justify your absurdly high preseason ranking
(clutching at straws!)
Season after season, year after year, you scramble
to make futile attempt
sat damage control when the Wolverines lose to a
grossly inferior opponent
(How'd Appalachian State score Thirty Fouuuuur?)
Inevitably, you'll bring up the past, boast of
National Championships won 40
years before you were born
(those were thedaaaaaays!)
You will point out that you have more wins than any
other program as though
that is relevant to the current season
(been playingsince the 1870's)
Go on, ignore that loss to Ohio State in the regular
season finale andcontinue to believe that you'll defeat your bowl
opponent with striking ease
(we'll win by thirteeeeeey!)
So crack open an ice cold Bud Light, oh Emperor of
Excuses, and take comfort
knowing that when you finish ranked number twenty,
you'll be back to numberfive when the preseason polls come out next year
(Mr. Delusional MichiganFan!)
4 comments:
Maybe its the sweet helmets that deludes ranking votes. I've always disliked the Wolverines (because I'm from Northern Indiana - I grew up thinking that great coaches need a lisp) but I've always liked their masculine suit design.
masculine "suit" design? Hmmm.
Tim, I know one thing: Either UM or ND should come out of this weekend with a win. You never know with those two this year though. Maybe they could do like 10 OT's and both come out 0-2-1 due to lightning ending the game. That would be awesome!!
Incidentally, can you say, "NFL season has begun"? Woo-hoo!
Um yes. I can. And sam said it was good.
Post a Comment